Sunday, October 7, 2012

Blind Determination

sooooo I am SORE from Pilates this morning. good grief. It dawned on me today that I haven't done anything remotely active in nearly 3 weeks... and yes I am supposed to be running a marathon in 1 month. 29 days to be exact.

I've been living in blissful ignorance for a long time now. Somehow I'm not even worried about it.  I refuse to recognize the magnitude of exactly what I'm about to undertake in just 4 weeks from today... I'm refusing to let the reality sink in that I am in no way shape or form even remotely prepared to run for 26.2 miles without stopping. Yet, I still have every intention of going through with this and doing it, and although I'm clearly not properly prepared, I still believe that I'll be able to do it.

Even if I just go out nice and easy, and just jog the entire race. Even if I have to stop and walk for part of it... if it happens, so be it. It would be completely mortifying, but can't get mad at myself for failing at something when I consciously chose not to prepare for it.  Besides I just want to experience this race - my goal is simply to have fun. I don't really care how I do. (of course I say that now... ask me how I feel after the race and I'll probably be kicking myself for not giving it my all.)

Tomorrow I'm planning to go for a long run. It's absolutely necessary at this point; it's my "do or die" moment.  If I can go out and run 12-18 miles comfortably and relatively easily, with minimal discomfort, I'll feel much more confident that I can tackle this marathon. If I can't... well... I will be in for a VERY rude awakening... but I'll worry about that only if it happens.  We're not even going to  entertain that possibility.

I'll conquer this marathon, propelled solely by blind stupidity and sheer determination.  It's amazing what you can achieve once you set your mind to something, and it's incredible what your body can do when you let your mind take over.  Marathons and endurance events are as much about mental toughness as they are about physical fitness. Perhaps even more so. My mind is ready to handle this race.

26.2 miles doesn't seem that daunting. I've done it once in my life I can surely do it again no problem.

This race will be difficult for sure, and I most likely will not be able to walk the next day, but I am going to do it. No matter what.

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